Let me start this off by saying that I'm sorry. I didn't mean for yesterday's entry to be so depressing. Well, that's not entirely honest. It's true that I was feeling that way yesterday, and I often do feel like that. But, I'm sorry to have dragged you down with me. I am a very emotional person, if you couldn't tell. Some days I feel so happy I could fly, and then there were days like yesterday. I think it all depends on how much sleep I get, and, as you know, that isn't something I achieve quite regularly. I debated about erasing the entry but then decided that wasn't something I wanted to do. For, no matter how embarrassed I am about something I have written, it was the truth. If I can't be brutally honest with myself, who can I be honest with? So, it shall remain.
I always knew writing out my feelings would tame whatever emotional upheaval was going on within me. I haven't done it for a long time though. Writing by hand is torture for me. I write very slowly, gripping the pen as tight as I can, until my hand burns like fire and becomes a deformed claw. If I try to continue my hand begins to shake, rendering the letters I'm trying to write virtually unrecognizable. So, until now, I've laid aside the written word choosing instead to keep my feelings bottled up inside of me. It hasn't been the best trade-off, which is why I decided to start this particular blog.
Good or bad, pretty or ugly, these are my words.
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